I’ve been in a very introspective mood since I got back from Mexico. Sometimes I think when one gets to a core place with oneself, one may not want to talk at all. At least that’s been my experience. Sometimes, silence is golden as they say. It gives you the opportunity to rethink things if there’s enough stillness. Still contemplating what I want to change in my life, what I want to create, how I’d like my life to be in the future, I haven’t really had much to say, because I’m still in that mulling over things mode.
However, I have been reading what I think is a very important book, called “Positivity” by Barbara Fredrickson. Not very far into it, but what I’m come away with so far, is that you can be either on a downward, negative spiral that feeds itself, or you can be on an upwards, positive spiral that feeds itself. Seems an obvious choice which one you’d like to be on, yet I have realized that there are people who thrive on negativity.
I’ve seen it up close and personal, at work, in my family, in my dates, in my friends even! Although perhaps this is generalizing, I do wonder if negativity is almost like nicotine; kind of addictive. I’ve vetoed dates (and realized later that I was lucky my date ending things) because guys have been too overly negative and pessimistic in their thinking. I’ve even, sad to say, told friends they are so negative that it’s just dragging me down and that if they can’t be at least somewhat positive I can’t be friends with them. And they’ve chosen the negativity! I am beginning to wonder if negative thoughts have some kind of receptor in the brain that if constantly used it becomes easier and easier to fire the negative neurons vs positives ones.
Of course the corresponding theory would mean that the more you experience and feel positive emotions such as joy and love, the more you’re able to fire those neurons! Makes me want to go on a negativity diet! Apparently however, one can’t completely have the rose-colored glasses on, because one does have to deal with “reality” as they say, but Fredrickson says that the key ratio is 3 positive emotions/experiences to 1 negative one.
Something to consider. Are you feeding positive change in your life? Or are you feeding negative thoughts/emotions that limit you without even knowing it? Given that Spring’s around the corner I’m all for doing an emotional/thought cleanse where I figure out what automatic negative thought might be holding me back from further growth! I highly recommend Fredrickson’s book to give you some food for future thoughts, and perhaps some positive change in your life.